summertimes

I'm a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for 3 days in a row. I woo men with my sensuous and godlike piano playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook thirty-minute Brownies in twenty minutes.
I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my back garden. I enjoy urban hang gliding. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured Wales with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby**** and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket.
I have performed several covert operations with MI6.. While on holiday in Namibia, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a whisk and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan and cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka.I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.
But I have yet to have a sugar daddy... :)

ps - I'm also caring, classy, compassionate, objective, funny, determined, arrogant, easy-going, giving, spontaneous, nostalgic, sure, positive yet realistic, outgoing, interesting, mellow, and a good friend or lover to have.

Laughter is my oxygen - sense of humor essential.